The Hell Butterfly

I Regret This

My head is heavy because of PoF. Who’d have thought it? Online dating is bringing back my depression. Fuck it. Fuck being too nice for my own good. Fuck wanting to be so polite I end up in bad situations I can’t get out of. Fuck having to try so hard. Fuck dating. Fuck pretending to date. Fuck pretending to want to. Fuck keeping up 6 different conversations with different topics and different tones. Fuck everything.

I did this for fun. I did this so I could have something interesting to talk about on my blog and all it’s doing is winding me up, creeping me out, and dragging myself through shit for the sake of this piece of shit website. I’m done. I regret it so, fucking much. I have people wanting to read my blog, when I’ve mentioned them in posts. I have people assuming I’m going to trust them enough after 2 days to go over to their fucking house and jump into a relationship with them. I don’t need this bullshit.

Fuck you, Plenty of Fish. You suck so hard.

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7 responses

  1. theMaliciousMuffin

    Damn.. That escalated quickly…

    July 21, 2014 at 2:15 am

    • It certainly did. It was a laugh at first, and it was only really for research and giggles. But then, as you say, it escalated quite fast. It got a little overwhelming, and was surprisingly more like work than fun. I plan to try not to take it so seriously from now though – after all I don’t have to meet these people and all it takes is deleting my account or blocking a member if certain avenues become more hassle than it’s worth!

      July 21, 2014 at 11:00 am

      • theMaliciousMuffin

        Haha yeah I think you should definitely give it another go some other time.. A bit selfishly, I quite enjoyed this little fiasco, even if it was at your expense, so sorry about that! Also, if I can make a suggestion, I think you should definitely stop over thinking all their messages. As a professional male person myself, I can certify that their first messages are not always a resume for their personalities, of course that excludes people who just say “hey”. Thanks for posting, am looking forward to more stuff on your blog!

        July 21, 2014 at 11:28 am

      • Haha, I’m glad you’ve been enjoying it! If I could ask, what has been most entertaining for you? I’d like to do more of the posts yourself and other readers like to see 🙂 I shall take your advice and not take it so seriously. I’ve seen most messages change after initial contact, but unfortunately they tend to change for the worse. I’ll keep at it but for now I think cruising in the back seat could be wise. Be assured I’ll try my best to make more posts along this line though!

        July 21, 2014 at 4:04 pm

      • theMaliciousMuffin

        Hey good for you! The main point of dating (well, I’m no expert) is to have fun, so don’t stress yourself at all about this. If you’re getting stained by the conversations they’re probably not worth it anyway, and you probably won’t follow through.
        As for my favourite part, I actually loved reading your reactions to their messages, they were nothing short of hilarious. Again, I’m just another guy with his own opinion, so take it or leave it. Take a break from this stuff, you definitely need your share of pina coladas on the beach.

        July 21, 2014 at 4:28 pm

  2. I’m sending you mental hugs. Maybe give the online dating thing a break, sometimes you meet someone when you stop looking. Keep your head up, here if you wanna talk. Paul

    July 21, 2014 at 1:58 pm

    • Mental hugs received. You may be right, and I’ll take that advice. I’m still checking it, but I will be taking a back seat on the more serious front for a time. Who’d have thought it was so stressful? I admit I got more wound up than I had need to, but that’s mostly passed and I hope to not take it so seriously from now on. Thankyou, I do appreciate it 🙂

      July 21, 2014 at 4:01 pm

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